Thursday, September 5, 2013

58 Year-Old Man Finally Listens to Led Zeppelin

"Not bad," says retired mechanic, grandfather

   CINCINNATI, OH -- Local retiree Dale Renert finally got the Led out yesterday morning.

   "Hey, not bad," he said, as he made it halfway through "Good Times Bad Times," the first track of the band's landmark 1969 self-titled album, Led Zeppelin, "Not bad at all."

   Renert, who retired in January after making a career as a mechanic for the last four decades, explained that he never really made time to sit down and listen to what many consider to be one of the greatest rock and roll bands in the history of music.

   Yelling over the sweet blues-inspired melodies of "Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You" and "You Shook Me," he explained, "We were just busy all the time down at the shop, you know. Outside of the one-hour lunch, it was hard to just get away for five minutes."

   "Yeah," he continued, listening to lead singer Robert Plant's soaring vocals on "Dazed and Confused," the album's fourth track. Renert later stated, "Well, now I know where they got that movie title."

   After listening to "Your Time is Gonna Come," side two of the album, listed at #29 on Rolling Stone's"500 Greatest Albums of All Time," Renert thought aloud, "The songs are a little long, huh?" He later retracted this comment after listening to the next two songs, "Black Mountain Side," and "Communication Breakdown."

   "Good drums," he said of the late John Bonham, who died in 1980 after asphyxiating on his own vomit after consuming 40 shots of vodka, "Really gets your feet tapping." After concluding the multi-platinum album with the dynamic cover of Willie Dixon's "I Can't Quit You Baby" and the epic eight-minute opus "How Many More Times," Renert concluded, "I can certainly see what their appeal was."

   When presented with the band's landmark follow-up album, Led Zeppelin II, Renert said to "just leave it on the coffee table," before retreating to his garage to work on the transmission of his 1998 Chevrolet Cavalier.

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