I Really Don't Care If You Stop Or Not

By A Stop Sign

   You know, when you drive your car on roads and streets all over the world, there are a lot of signs you have to pay attention to: Speed Limit, School Zone, Do Not Enter. Arguably, however, there is no sign more important than your friendly neighborhood Stop sign.

   I'm going to break it to you, tough guy: I really couldn't care less if you actually stop or not.

   What's that? You say that you have to stop? Says who, Brainiac? Me? I don't care. If you don't see any cars coming, just keep driving, man. Just keep driving. Slow down if you feel nervous, but don't worry about me. I'm fine.

   You know what? Just blow through the intersection if you want to. Ambulances ignore me. The police and fire departments do, too. Why can't you? Just lay on your damn horn and when you get within 25 feet of me - in fact, as soon as you see my beautiful, red face -- just slam on the gas.  

   Hypothetical: Say you completely ignore me -- and you can, like I said, I don't care -- and you end up in a terrible wreck involving a few fatalities, possibly including your own. Will I care then? The answer is no. Why? Well, a.) odds are that I won't even see it, b.) it's your life and I'm not your boss and c.) I don't know you.

   Don't get me wrong: I'm not advocating that people risk their lives. I don't want people going around getting into accidents and blaming it all on the stop sign. I'm just telling you that don't care one way or the other. You can do whatever you want, man.

   If you do stop, great. If not, whatever. I don't care.